Folio, folias, foliat, foliamus, foliates, foliant.
LATIN – glorious. If that was Latin, and I’m almost certain it isn’t, perhaps it could mean:
- ‘I eat at Folium’
- ‘You eat at Folium’
- ‘He eats at Folium’
- ‘We eat at Folium’
- ‘They eat at Folium’
If after reading this review you decide you want to eat at Folium, which I suspect you will, perhaps give them a ring and just say, “Foliates?” with a rising intonation to indicate it being a question, over and over again.
“Hello, Folium, how can I help?”
“Oh, you would like to eat at Folium. Of course, how many people?”
“A mensa, duabusquaeso.”
“A table for two, not a problem.”
FUN FACT: Every member of staff – the waiting team: Quintus, Scintilla and Horatia & head chef Flaccus – all speak fluent Latin.
Now, I bet you’re wondering what the food is like aren’t you? Is it traditional Latin fare? Well, the Latin poet Horace ate a meal of onions, porridge, and pancake, not exactly ‘Potato, Smoked Eel and Chicken Skin‘ is it? No, it’s not. That is however the first dish of the Folium tasting menu.
“Very fucking nice it was too,” as Horace would say. I have no idea how anyone cannot like smoked eel, it’s fantastic and improves ANY dish. That’s right ANY. Chuck some on that Pop Tart you’re eating and get back to me.
Next up was my least favourite dish of the evening: Mackerel, Cucumber, English Wasabi. It was refreshing and a little tart, but the mackerel got a bit lost, poor Mackerel – COME HOME SOON! We miss you!
Kohlrabi, Parmesan, Manjimup Truffle. This was delicious. So much so, I ate most of it before I remembered to take a photo. The Kohlrabi used as a tagliatelle style pasta blew my little mind. The truffle is from Australia – I know, madness!
Cod, Mussel, Parsley. Good, solid, 7.5 / 10. You know, that middle dish in a tasting menu where you’re like, “OK, yeah, pretty good, but bring on the lamb.”
Salt Marsh Lamb, Asparagus, Seaweed. FUCK YEAH. Lovely stuff. Would eat again, three times a day if necessary.
Sheep Milk Yoghurt, Wild Strawberry, Elderflower. PHWOAR. You saucy, yoghurty, little minx. Is that aerated white chocolate on there too? You absolute DEVIL!
Chocolate, Cobnut, Burnt Cream. Creamy, chocolate sex lord.
I think that gives you a pretty good idea of how the evening went. I had high expectations for Folium and they were met. Well done / Bene factum.